What does Auntie Karen think of your boys group?

Every “tonight do what”, every plan that died, every man who confirms at 6pm and turns up never. Counted and read back to you.

Boys group NS batch Uni group CCA kakis Ex Situationship Talking stage Crush Girlfriend Boyfriend Fiancée Wife Husband Friends with benefits Girls group Best friend Siblings Family group Cousins Work group Colleague Sports group Travel group Mahjong kakis
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The numbers, a preview and a card, free. Pay once for the full report, or don’t. Never a subscription.

How it works

What you actually get

A report worth screenshotting

This is about a chat we made up, and this is only the start of it. The preview on your own chat is free and runs a little further; the rest is one payment.

EXAMPLE A boys group chat we made up · 8 Jan 2023 to 26 Sep 2026

Tonight Do What

Tonight Do What: How Five Grown Men Spent Three Years Failing to Eat Dinner Together While Invoicing an Empty Chair

AKAUNTIE
Auntie Karen

An AI auntie with no filter, too many opinions and an unexplained loyalty to Milo.

I have spent the last few days sifting through 38,420 messages of unanswered questions, cancelled steamboats and a betting slip that should be taught in economics classes as a warning.

You are not a friend group. You are not a social club. You are five men in a long-distance relationship with dinner, and the proof is Sathish, alone in his kitchen at 10.40pm, frying a bag of prawns for a party that died in the chat two hours earlier.

Let’s open the case files.

The Accused: Five Men, One Question, No Dinner

Jun Kai: The Chief Executive of Nah

Jun Kai is the founder, the chairman and the single greatest obstacle this group has ever faced. Every afternoon at 4.17pm, with the punctuality of a school bell and the leadership of a wet tissue, he types the same three words and then shoots down every answer like a man defending airspace nobody is trying to enter. The daily ritual:

Make my own reportRead the full example report

The full report is S$14.90 by PayNow for a group, S$8.90 for two people.

Still inside:

  • The Accused: Five Men, One Question, No Dinner (the rest of it)
  • Saga One: The Steamboat That Died of Natural Causes
  • Saga Two: The Fifth Chair
  • The Dishonours List
  • The Ruling
  • A closer look at each of you

And the rest of what she wrote.

Free with your preview

Cards for your story

Every preview comes with a card to post. The full report adds one for the group and one for each of you, to send to the person it is about. Names, initials or numbers, and six colours: you choose when you save it.

  • A red story card reading I got read, with the report title Tonight Do What and the five epithets Auntie Karen gave a made-up boys group.
    Free with your preview
  • A dark group card with the Tonight Do What title and the line-up of five made-up friends, each with their epithet.
    With the full report: the group card
  • A green member card for Hafiz, called The Professional Confirmer, Amateur Arriver, with one line about him.
    And one for each of you: Hafiz’s
  • A brown member card for Sathish, called The Mix Parlay Messiah, Cash-Out Coward, with one line about him.
    Sathish’s, in Milo

These cards are drawn from the made-up chat above, by the same code that draws yours.

Auntie has been busy

101,757Messages read
9Chats she has read
19People roasted
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Questions people ask before uploading

What is Auntie Karen?

An AI auntie that reads your chats and says what everyone was thinking but nobody typed.

Which apps work?

WhatsApp and Telegram. Nothing else, yet.

What does it cost?
  • Free: message counts, a preview and a share card.
  • Full report: from S$8.90 by PayNow for two people, S$14.90 for groups.
  • Groups of 3 to 20 people.
  • Card totals including processing fees: S$9.74 for two people, S$15.95 for groups.
  • Pay once. No subscription.
Who can read my chat?

Your export is encrypted on your device. Our own reader unlocks it in memory, and two AI companies, OpenAI and Anthropic, process it to write your report. OpenAI reads a selection for the free preview and every message for a paid report. Anthropic gets notes about your chat and the messages they quote, not the whole chat. Both are set up so they do not train on it. The details are on the privacy page.

How long do you keep it?

Your uploaded chat is deleted as soon as your report is finished, or within 24 hours if the report cannot be written. An upload abandoned before any purchase goes within 24 hours. Your report stays until you delete it. If you never sign in, it is deleted after 90 days. Deleting is immediate.

Can I share the report?

Only if you choose to. Nothing is public. You can switch on a private link, turn it off, or replace it.

What languages does she understand?

Chats in: English, Singlish, Manglish, Mandarin, Malay, Tamil, and chats that switch between them mid-sentence. You choose the language of the report when you set up. Reports in: English, Chinese (Simplified), Chinese (Traditional), Malay, Indonesian, Tamil, Thai, Vietnamese, Tagalog, Japanese, Korean, Hindi, Spanish, French. Quotes from your chat are never translated.

Is anyone in the chat told about this?

No. Nobody gets a notification. Only upload a chat you are allowed to share, and only if everyone in it is an adult.

Ready? Let Auntie read it.

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