What does Auntie Karen think of you and your friends?

She counts every message, reads the conversations that mattered, gives each of you an epithet you will not forgive, and says the thing everybody has been too polite to type.

Boys group Girls group Best friend NS batch Uni group CCA kakis Ex Situationship Talking stage Crush Girlfriend Boyfriend Fiancée Wife Husband Friends with benefits Siblings Family group Cousins Work group Colleague Sports group Travel group Mahjong kakis
Try it free

The numbers, a preview and a card, free. Pay once for the full report, or don’t. Never a subscription.

How it works

What you actually get

A report worth screenshotting

This is about a chat we made up, and this is only the start of it. The preview on your own chat is free and runs a little further; the rest is one payment.

EXAMPLE A group chat we made up · 12 Jan to 27 Sep 2026

Bangkok 2.0

Bangkok 2.0: How Five Adults Spent Nine Months Not Leaving Singapore While One of Them Blamed DBS for S$118

AKAUNTIE
Auntie Karen

An AI auntie with no filter, too many opinions and an unexplained loyalty to Milo.

I have spent the last few days sifting through 11,284 messages of itinerary drafts, phantom bank transfers and a seven-tab Google Sheet that only its creator has ever opened, and I came out the other side with a thousand-yard stare and the words “PayNow tonight” burned into the back of my eyelids.

You are not a travel group. You are not even five friends who enjoy travelling. You are five adults who have been standing in the same departure hall since January, staring at a board that says DELAYED, clutching S$590 of Scoot tickets and agreeing with each other that honestly, it is a very nice hall.

Let’s open the case files.

The Accused: Five Adults, Zero Boarding Passes

Bernice: “Mother” / The Spreadsheet Dictator Nobody Obeys

Bernice is not the organiser of this group. She is its unpaid civil service, its central bank and its only working organ, and she runs all three out of a Google Sheet with a tab called Plan C (if Rahul), the single most accurate forecast produced in Singapore this year. The others call her Mother, which is what you call a woman once you have decided she will be doing your admin until she dies. As she announced one Monday, to four people who had already muted her:

Make my own reportRead the full example report

The full report is S$14.90 by PayNow for a group, S$8.90 for two people.

Still inside:

  • The Accused: Five Adults, Zero Boarding Passes (the rest of it)
  • Episode One: The Sheet, the Other Sheet and the Very Nervous Bank
  • Episode Two: Four Ways Not to Leave Singapore
  • The Dishonours List
  • The Sentencing
  • A closer look at each of you

And the rest of what she wrote.

Free with your preview

Cards for your story

Every preview comes with a card to post. The full report adds one for the group and one for each of you, to send to the person it is about. Names, initials or numbers, and six colours: you choose when you save it.

  • A red story card reading I got read, with the report title about five made-up friends who spent nine months not leaving Singapore, and the five epithets Auntie Karen gave them.
    Free with your preview
  • A dark group card with the Bangkok 2.0 title and the line-up of five made-up friends, from The Spreadsheet Dictator Nobody Obeys to The Human Thumbs-Up Emoji.
    With the full report: the group card
  • A brown member card for Bernice, called The Spreadsheet Dictator Nobody Obeys, with one line about her.
    And one for each of you: Bernice’s
  • A pink member card for Zhi Hao, called The Lottery Mystic Without a Passport, with one line about him.
    Zhi Hao’s, in blush

These cards are drawn from the made-up chat above, by the same code that draws yours.

Auntie has been busy

101,757Messages read
9Chats she has read
19People roasted
WhatsApp & Telegram

Questions people ask before uploading

What is Auntie Karen?

An AI auntie that reads your chats and says what everyone was thinking but nobody typed.

Which apps work?

WhatsApp and Telegram. Nothing else, yet.

What does it cost?
  • Free: message counts, a preview and a share card.
  • Full report: from S$8.90 by PayNow for two people, S$14.90 for groups.
  • Groups of 3 to 20 people.
  • Card totals including processing fees: S$9.74 for two people, S$15.95 for groups.
  • Pay once. No subscription.
Who can read my chat?

Your export is encrypted on your device. Our own reader unlocks it in memory, and two AI companies, OpenAI and Anthropic, process it to write your report. OpenAI reads a selection for the free preview and every message for a paid report. Anthropic gets notes about your chat and the messages they quote, not the whole chat. Both are set up so they do not train on it. The details are on the privacy page.

How long do you keep it?

Your uploaded chat is deleted as soon as your report is finished, or within 24 hours if the report cannot be written. An upload abandoned before any purchase goes within 24 hours. Your report stays until you delete it. If you never sign in, it is deleted after 90 days. Deleting is immediate.

Can I share the report?

Only if you choose to. Nothing is public. You can switch on a private link, turn it off, or replace it.

What languages does she understand?

Chats in: English, Singlish, Manglish, Mandarin, Malay, Tamil, and chats that switch between them mid-sentence. You choose the language of the report when you set up. Reports in: English, Chinese (Simplified), Chinese (Traditional), Malay, Indonesian, Tamil, Thai, Vietnamese, Tagalog, Japanese, Korean, Hindi, Spanish, French. Quotes from your chat are never translated.

Is anyone in the chat told about this?

No. Nobody gets a notification. Only upload a chat you are allowed to share, and only if everyone in it is an adult.

Ready? Let Auntie read it.

Try it free